Dating a man who drinks alot on weekends
The pressing issue, I told him, was not a medical diagnosis but that his drinking was hurting his marriage. What matters is that my drinking upsets Claudia.' "'Exactly,' I answered.
Since I know from experience that most drinkers resist the term alcoholic, the key to my intervention style is to avoid characterizing the drinking as bad and simply emphasize the fact that it is jeopardizing the drinker's well-being.
It's always 'Bobby this' and 'Bobby that.' It's enough to make me want to throw up! I'm an only child and my parents doted on me, so I can only guess how much their attitude must hurt Jack.
"I suppose I should be grateful that Jack works hard and brings home good money, but it upsets me that he's so uninvolved with me and the kids. What's weird is that he was extremely sweet and attentive when we first got together.
I'd try to get him to talk in the evenings, but he'd just shrug and turn on the TV. We'd have beach parties every weekend in the summer, and Jack would get totally hammered.
He's a 'happy drunk' and he'd make an idiot of himself in front of the kids and our guests -- telling stupid jokes, flirting with other guys' wives, singing off-key, and generally embarrassing himself.
He doesn't have a clue about the normal give-and-take that happens between people who love each other. He's the younger of two boys, and his parents have always favored their older son, Bobby, a neurosurgeon who makes loads of money.
It gives me a chance to forget about how our life is turning out.
"The other guys drank a lot, too, but Jack was the worst.
When the guests would start leaving, he'd always try to convince them to stay, regardless of the hour.
I thought if I was a good provider, Claudia would be happy. I love her, but I feel that she doesn't love me the way she used to.
I hope counseling will help." "During a private session, I told Jack that the fact that he drinks only at parties and can stay away from alcohol for long periods does not mean he's not an alcoholic," said the counselor.